Brotherly Love (John 15:12-17)

The Lord Jesus is instructing his disciples about the importance of abiding in him and is informing them about several effects of this abiding. So far he has mentioned some effects as they are expressed towards himself (absorbing his word, praying about it, obeying it, experiencing joy). Now he speaks in verses 12-17 about an effect that will be displayed towards each other, that is brotherly love; in verses 18-25 he will explain an effect concerning the world, which is opposition. So abiding in Christ has effects in three directions: towards himself, towards other believers, and from the world. It is the second relationship that we will consider today.

One of the strongest influences that our society has had on the church is its concept of individualism. It stresses an individual’s rights and privileges. It is impossible to love in a Christlike way if we follow that emphasis. The opposite of individualism is community, and the church is a community, a family. Jesus is reminding his disciples that they are to live as the family of God, which means living in love for one another. This is a clear way in which the difference between Christians and non-Christians is seen.

At this point, we may ask why the singular noun ‘commandment’ is used by Jesus rather than the plural which he used a few lines previously. Two possible options can be suggested. One option is that this is the most important commandment. It is obvious that some commands are more important than others. For example, we are told to obey human governments, but not if their requirements cause us to disobey God. Jesus did teach that there were degrees of greatness in the commandments on the occasion when a lawyer asked him about the matter. The lawyer asked Jesus, ‘Teacher, which is the great commandment in the Law?’  Jesus said to him, ‘You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the great and first commandment.  And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbour as yourself. On these two commandments depend all the Law and the Prophets’ (Matt. 22:36-40). Jesus clearly says that love to God and love to our fellowmen are the most important requirements.

Of course, we are to note that Jesus does not say that other commandments are unimportant. His teaching elsewhere makes it clear that he regarded all the commandments as important: ‘Therefore whoever relaxes one of the least of these commandments and teaches others to do the same will be called least in the kingdom of heaven, but whoever does them and teaches them will be called great in the kingdom of heaven’ (Matt. 5:19).  We cannot use a supposed obedience to one commandment to prevent obedience to another commandment just to suit ourselves.

The other option is that this command to love our brethren is the most comprehensive commandment, that if we obey it we also keep every other commandment. The opposite would also be the case: that if we don’t keep it, then everything else is unacceptable. Can we love God if we don’t love our fellow Christians? The apostle John says that we cannot love God if we don’t love other Christians: ‘If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen’ (1 John 4:20).  

Paul stresses the importance of loving relationships in Romans 13:8-10: ‘Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who loves another has fulfilled the law.  The commandments, “You shall not commit adultery, You shall not murder, You shall not steal, You shall not covet,” and any other commandment, are summed up in this word: “You shall love your neighbour as yourself.”  Love does no wrong to a neighbour; therefore love is the fulfilling of the law.’ Paul is saying that these various commandments are worked out in interaction with other people. His words show that the importance of Jesus’ commandment is its comprehensiveness.

Another example can be taken from Paul’s well-known description of love in 1 Corinthians 13. There he gives a list of spiritual activities that are only of value if done in love. ‘If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.  If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.’  He suggests that it is possible to perform many activities which seem of value but in fact are not because love was missing.

The comprehensiveness of this commandment enables us to see its importance. Brotherly love is not an option; it is evidence of the genuineness of Christian behaviour. In fact, if it is absent, there cannot be any evidence that we are Christians. For example, we could imagine a list of things that mark Christians: certain beliefs, particular practices, brotherly love. Christians can have wrong beliefs and still be true believers and they can have wrong practices and remain real Christians (this is obvious from church history). But a true Christian cannot hate or despise other Christians. Of course, he will be grieved at some things they say or do; he may disapprove strongly of what they say or do; he realises that sometimes other Christians have to be disciplined for what they say or do. But love must remain.

So how do we show brotherly love? By submitting to Christ and by imitating Christ.

Regarding brotherly love, the first point to mention is that it can only be done if we recognise the sovereignty of Christ. Loving fellow Christians is not an option suggested by church leaders. Jesus commands his people to love another. Every day, we should set Christ apart as Lord in our hearts. In doing so, we submit every aspect of our lives to his rule: our thinking, our emotions and our actions. We ask him to enable us by his indwelling Spirit to live as Christians inwardly as well as outwardly. Love is an inward attitude and feeling that often reveals itself in actions. But it does not exist merely in outward actions when physical contact is made. So we submit to Christ and ask him to help us love our brethren.

We have to ask for his help because we are still sinful. There is no need to pray for brotherly love in heaven. There is harmony there, not only of what they believe, but also of what they think of one another. Here that is not the case. Every Christian should say, ‘The biggest obstacle to increase of brotherly love is in me.’ I sense pride, self-centredness, wrong assessments, misunderstandings, confusion, lack of knowledge and other features in myself which can sadly affect brotherly love. Is it not true that even trivial arguments often persist because one party does not wish to lose face even although he knows he was wrong?

The manner of Christian love – sacrificial response

Jesus says that his disciples are to love one another is a manner similar to how he loved them. There are many ways in which we can think about the love of Jesus. For example, his love was a personal one because he loved them individually. Further, his love was a persevering one because he put up with all their failures and apparent indifference to his teaching. His love was also very practical in the sense that he did things for them such as washing their feet. But here Jesus stresses the sacrificial nature of his love.

First, I think Jesus is saying that they should love one another because he died for them all. It is inconceivable that they cannot love someone whom Jesus loves, whatever their faults. Jesus knew a lot more about them than the faults that fellow disciples could see. These faults did not stop him loving them and our awareness of faults should not prevent us loving them.

Second, Jesus is saying that they should love one another in giving themselves for one another. Obviously they cannot do so to the degree that Jesus did. But there are ways in which they can follow Christ’s example. They can do good to one another, they can pray for one another. Praying lovingly for a Christian who has offended us is costly, but it is Christlike. Jesus prayed for headstrong, self-confident Peter; when we see such behaviour in believers we should pray earnestly for their restoration.

The manner of Christian love – recognise their status

Jesus reminds his disciples that he has not treated them as mere servants only. They were also his friends, although this does not mean that they ceased to be servants. Jesus revealed his friendship to his disciples by revealing to them what the Father had told him to say. Jesus had declared unto them the name of the Father and had taught them about his character. He had told them many details about the Father. Let us briefly note some of them: the Father forgives sinners (the story of the prodigal son); the Father intends to give the kingdom to his little flock (Luke 12:32); the Father hears and answers prayers of his children (Matt. 6:6); the Father provides for our daily needs (Matt. 6:32); the Father protects his people (John 10:29). In addition to these functions, there is also the variety of roles of the Father that Jesus describes in this upper room teaching.

Friendship is obviously an act of love. Imitating the Friend of sinners includes speaking about the matters that he spoke about. Therefore we should speak to fellow believers about the purposes and promises of God as well as about our own experience of his grace.  Friends have shared interests, mutual concerns and common desires.

In addition to sacrificial acts and proper speech Jesus mentions a third way of love.

The manner of Christian love – appreciate their contribution

Jesus tells his disciples that he chose them for particular roles. ‘You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you’ (John 15:16).  I don’t think that Jesus is referring to election here but to the call that he gave to these disciples to be his apostles. They were selected for a common purpose and it would be absurd for each of them not to love the others who shared the task.

None of us are called to be apostles. Yet each of us has been given particular gifts by Christ to use in his service. Some of these gifts are more prominent than others. But none of the gifts are to be ignored or despised. Each needs to be appreciated by the others. Other believers are to love them for the contribution they are making to the increase of the Saviour’s kingdom. Obviously they will pray for them, and the Saviour says here that the Father will answer their prayers when this is their outlook.

Abiding in Christ, as we saw previously, means absorbing his word, praying about it, practising it, and experiencing joy. A simple, straightforward lifestyle. Similarly, the expression of brotherly love is simple and straightforward. We love other believers by doing things for them, by speaking to them about the things of the kingdom, and by appreciating their contribution to Christ’s cause. Sadly, as we know, simplicity does not mean implementation. Thankfully, we have the Holy Spirit to enable us to do so.